Mrs. Hanson: (Holding a sleeping Zoë) You’re going to have a surprise guest teacher today while I help the girls work on their model of Jamestown in the other room. We asked this person because there’s such an amazing courtroom scene in the play you just studied . . .

Mr. Hanson: (Has the game Memory in his hands with Mackie by his side) . . . since neither your mother nor I went to law school, we thought . . .

(Catching sight of the "guest," Zac decides to tease him.)

Zac: I just hope it’s not Christopher Sabec . . . That guy has no sense of humor. I mean, I think we still owe him a soaking -- a super soaking to be exact . . . (Pretending to just notice him) Oh Chris. (Then smirking as he gets up to walk toward him.) Hey, what’s up?

Christopher: Za-ac . . . (Backing away, smiling), you know we already talked about how I’m neutral territory in your water wars . . .

(Zac pretends to step menacingly in his direction, while keeping an evil eye on him.)

Zac: Mom, where did we put our weapons after the tour?

Christopher: Switzerland, Zac. Think Switzerland. Check your WWII history book -- no involvement of any kind (chuckling).

Zac: (Looking at his watch) Hmmm . . . December 1998. Seems like WWII is (pause) . . . OVER! (wicked laughter)

Christopher: Okay, just wait till we can fight fair. (Taking off his suit coat.) Hey, Tay -- Ike! (He greets their parents before Mr. and Mrs. Hanson head out with Mackie.) So I hear you just finished, "Merchant of Venice" -- one of Shakespeare’s finest in my opinion.

(Zac’s face falls for a second, but then he decides to plop back down on the couch with a shrug.)

Taylor: (with a smile) Ike just might have to disagree with you there, since he owns both the 1970s version of "Romeo and Juliet" and the Claire Danes one -- which we have to tear him away from after about a week of watching it twenty-four/seven.

Isaac: Excuse me for having an appreciation for the Bard’s tragedies . . . (He opens his arms as if to question "What?")

Zac: (Dramatically, in a partially mocking voice) But soft, what light through yonder window breaks? It is the east and Juliet is the sun . . .

Isaac: See, even Zac can quote these immortal lines due to these classic films. (Zac pretends to bow -- Thank you, Thank you very much.)

Zac: Wait, isn’t one of your first girlfriends in that "Tulsa" story named Juliet, Ike?

Taylor: Anyway . . . (He looks expectantly at Christopher.)

Christopher: Guys, I thought we’d do something different today. I think it might be kind of cool to update this story -- make it real for you. So, I’d like you to choose your favorite scene and rewrite it. We can perform it for your parents. You might be able to persuade your sisters to be actresses, if you need them.

Taylor: We can use your legal counsel if we choose the courtroom scene?

Christopher: Good point, Tay. I actually took a lit class at law school where we sat around and discussed this play and other books like To Kill a Mockingbird.

Zac: We read that. They convict an innocent man and kill him even though Atticus, his lawyer, proved that there was no way he could have attacked that girl. The guy’s arm was paralyzed or something from an accident.

Isaac: That was all about race -- because he was black and the girl was white. It was so unfair, but Atticus treated the guy with dignity, yeah respect, anyway. Actually, Scout, Atticus’ daughter, could easily have grown up to be Portia in this play. Portia finds a way to outsmart just about everybody and still show respect for them.

Christopher: I never thought of that before. Scout as a judge? Why not? There are racial issues in this play too. Shylock is Jewish – He’s the guy whose hatred of Antonio causes him to ask for "a pound of flesh" if Antonio can’t repay his loans. The Jews have always experienced prejudice. Many people don’t know what Shakespeare’s attitude toward this character really was – because, at times, Shylock seems just completely cruel and blood-thirsty.

Taylor: What’s weird though, is that the words we sort of used in Don’t Accuse: "If you prick us, do we not bleed?" are spoken by Shylock to remind us that we’re no different than anybody else. We all have the same feelings . . . no matter if you’re . . .

Zac: (Breaking into a Michael Jackson number) "It doesn’t matter if you’re black or white . . ." (He looks at everybody and realizes they’re not going to join him.) Okay, eh, yeah . . . How about: "We’ve been blessed by the children – black, yellow and white . . . " (There’s no stopping him now.) "They believe in the things, we’ve tried to deny . . .

(Unconsciously, Taylor begins to sing softly before catching himself.)

Taylor: "So throw down your weapons . . . (coughing to stop himself from going further.)

Christopher: No go on . . . (Teasing them) You guys could include a soundtrack for your skits. Who knows – material for your next studio album?

Isaac: Actually, you know what? . . . Wait, no, I’ll put that in the scene that we’re going to be re-writing (Cheesy grin). This is going to be good. hehe

Taylor: I know what scene you’re thinking of doing . . .

Isaac: Oh yeah?

Taylor: When Portia puts all those people who want to marry her through that test?

Isaac: What? You thought I’d choose that scene? You actually thought that would be the scene I’d choose? How could you?

Taylor: Because it IS the one you want to do. (smiling)

Isaac: (to Christopher) He’s right. It is. (shrugs)

Zac: I think it’s so cool how all the stories in the play link together. From the two best friends who need money and ask the merchant for some, to one of the guys marrying the lady who ends up bailing out his best friend in court when the merchant wants to collect on his loan . . . to collect his flesh.

Christopher: That’s one way of summarizing this play. Impressive, Zac.

Isaac: Don’t forget how the lady who was dressed like a man to be the judge in court. She and her best friend (still dressed like men) trick their husbands into giving up their wedding rings after the trial.

Taylor: Dad would be in so much trouble if he ever did something like that . . . (grinning)

Christopher: But do you think your Mom could pull that over on him though?

All three: For sure! (chuckling)

Christopher: (shaking his head in amusement) Well, if you guys are going to do the scene about Portia’s test to find the right guy – do you have any questions about the court scenes before you start writing?

Zac: Have you ever told someone they could have a pound of flesh from another person? You ARE a lawyer, aren’t you?

Christopher: Tay . . . Ike When did we book the O.R. for your brother? Was it for this afternoon?

Zac: (attempting to sound sarcastic) You ARE funny, Chris! A regular comedian! But remember only skin! No blood or we get your car and your house and your jet skis . . .

Christopher: You’re quick, Zac! That’s how Portia gives Shylock what he wants without actually letting him have it. Didn’t you think Portia’s mercy speech was amazing?

        The quality of mercy is not strained,
        It droppeth as the gentle rain from heaven,
        Upon the place beneath.
        It is twice blest:
        It blesseth him that gives and him that takes.

Taylor: If Shylock were to shed any blood at all when he went to get his pound of flesh from Antonio, he would technically be seeking the life of another citizen and he would have to face his own penalty.

Isaac: And so, ironically, in the end, he’s the one who benefits most from Portia’s words. Whoa!

Taylor: It’s too bad that Antonio is the only one who is left all alone without a girl at the end of the play. I mean, the guy was willing to have his body ripped apart for his best friend, Bassanio. (Smirking and putting out his hands as if to introduce the next act) Zac?

Zac: (Dramatically) Where’s the LOVE?

Christopher: Well, I guess you guys are ready to start writing. I brought some work, but just let me know if you need anything. Let’s see where you guys are in about 30 minutes? (The guys agree. They open their copies of the play and start paging through it, occasionally chewing on a fingernail as they begin to write. Soon, they collaborate on an idea.)

Copyright ©1999. All rights reserved.
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