john steinbeck

of mice and men

Taylor: This is definitely one intense book.

Zac: This time it really was about mice and men. It could actually be called, "To Kill a Mouse or To Kill an Old Dog or To Kill a Puppy or a Girl or To Kill a Man . . . Hey, can I hold your new baby sister? To Kill a . . ."

Taylor: (Throws his hands up as if to shield himself.) I think, we've got it, Zac. You're right. It's true there's tons of dying in here.

Zac: I mean, I know we talked about (dramatic voice) to kill or not to kill a mockingbird (back to normal voice) and everything, but that book has nothing on the (pretends to shoot a gun, "ka-plow", "Ka-plow") in this one.

Isaac: In an mmmbang, it's gone. (Pretends to shoot Zac in the head. Zac acts out a dramatic stage death.)

Zac: (as he keels over) The rumors are true about me! Unbook the tour!

Taylor: Ike, (raising an eyebrow) mmmbang?

Zac: (Sits up) Hey, why are you shooting me?

Isaac: (In Mild Kingdom voice) Billy Bob, aren't you the retarded one?

Zac: Oh yeah. (Pleading) Can I still feed the rabbits?! Let me feed the rabbits, PLEASE!

Taylor: (impatient) Although, Ike, what you were saying about mmmbop (or were you?), It actually makes sense with these guys. I mean, here're these 2 guys who just want to earn enough so that they can get a farm and live a simple life . . . George knows that it's only Lennie he can trust. But, his true friendship is put to the ultimate test. He proves, in the end, that he does care. And then (pause), it's gone. Lennie has to die.

Isaac: (starts to sing thoughtfully) You have so many relationships in this life, only one or two will last. You go through all the pain and strife, you turn your back and it's gone so fast. (Stops singing) Yeah, yeah, Tay, totally.

Taylor: (singing earnestly) So hold onto the ones who really care, in the end they'll be the only ones there. When you get old - (comments) well Lennie isn't going to get too old-(quick grin, then sings again) and start to lose your hair. (pauses) Hare?

Zac: Oh you mean, hare! I get it, Tay. (in his wacky voice) Casey, I'd like to make a request and dedication to our good friend, Lennie. (starts to sing) Can you tell me who will still care? (Exaggerated, shouting) Who will still care?! (Pauses dramatically) I think I'm gonna' cry. Ike, toss me the klennex travel pack Mom got us for our trips. (pretends to sniffle and wipe away tears). (New York accent) Please, too-alk amongst yourselves. (Lips tighten as if holding back tears) Topic: The solo careers of the band currently known as Hanson. Discuss. (Waves his hands in large circles while still sniffling.)

Isaac: Well, Artist formerly known as Zac, what does our song have to do with these two characters?

Zac: I don't know, you guys said it.

Taylor: We're talking about how these guys only have each other and yet, they spend the whole time wondering . . .

Isaac: Zac, don't . . . don't . . .

Zac: Sorry Oprah! I lied. It's true. We can't help it (bursts into his signature introduction of) "Where's the Love?!"

Taylor: That's actually true. I mean, you can never expect that the two characters who are probably the only people you would call friends in the book end up doing the most, well, killing in it.

Isaac: (Jim Carey voice) Did I hear somebody say, irony? Yeah, that's what I said. (Back to own voice). The thing is, that every time it's killing time, the whole death has been entirely set up or shall we say, foreshadowed? I mean, look a the way they killed old Candy's dog, with the same gun that's used in the end.

Zac: I know irony is when we're beating the snot out of each other at the end of TTMON, but the whole time we're going, "We're basically best friends. You know all brothers fight sometimes, but we're not like that . . ." And isn't foreshadowing like when Mom has a baby, we pretty much know there's another one coming in about two years?

Taylor: Zac, please don't say that. You know, the whole time I was reading this book, I couldn't stop thinking about, well, Sam.

Zac: Oh, "Sam I am" Sam? Yeah, he's crazy.

Isaac: Zac, you know, You're his favorite cousin. How about the time he knocked you down.

Zac: But I got up again!

Isaac: Zac, no one is ever going to keep you down!

Taylor: He sings the songs that remind him of the good times, he sings the songs that remind him of the . . . anyway, remember how we were just getting out of the van to go see him at the Special Olympics when SPLAT! (Laughing) He took you down, Zac, he was just so happy to see you.

Zac: Tay, you can laugh about it, but you weren't he one getting TKOed. Ding! Ding! Ding! and it's the ZacMan down for the count. Sam "I think I'm going to need a" Lawyer, the defending heavyweight Champion of the World retaining his title.

Isaac: Didn't he put the Louisville Slugger on you and then come after me?

Taylor: Ike, that was when we were fighting for the title of "Most Annoying Band in the World" last January. Don't you remember?

Isaac: (Smacks his head) My memory's been in and out ever since that elevator hostage situation in New York.

Taylor: Or could it be that you were smoking more than Winstons when Mom caught you and our tour was cancelled? Huh?

Zac: Thank God Mom caught it in time or you would be down to only 5% of your brain by now.

Isaac: Thanks for caring, guys! No, really, the patch is working for me. I swear. Excuse me, I'm going to check to see if we got any mail today.

(Taylor and Zac pretend to jump on him, "Ike, don't do it! You've got your whole life ahead of you!" Isaac, "Just one! I promise.")

Isaac: (Throwing them off and sitting back down.) Okay, so the rumors aren't true? Back to the whole Sam thing. I was talking to Abby and she was sayig that Sam can be so infuriating sometimes. That she used to pretend that he wasn't her brother. Especially when they would be at church and he would come up to her friends and try to kiss them - and you know his kisses aren't exactly, um, innocent. She wanted to just disappear.

Taylor: How about (Pretends to ask Sam a question) "Sam, where did you guys go on vacation?" (Sam's goofy voice) "Pickle." "Sam, what's your favorite basketball team?"

Zac and Isaac: Pickle.

Taylor: Yeah, that whole pickle thing was really weird.

Isaac: What about the time when Grampa nd Gramma thought he was going to pull down his pants right in the middle of dinner?

Zac: And he just stood up to check to make sure his zipper was up? OH yeah, I almost wet myself that time.

Taylor: Gramma was so cool about it though. She actually was crying, she was laughing so hard.

Isaac: What made me think of George and Lennie from the book was that Abby said she can talk to Sam about anything and she knows he will only listen and not judge her.

Taylor: And you know how he's amazing at the organ. He really could almost join the band.

Isaac: But is MTV ready for Sam? On the other hand, who's a better role model, Sam or Beavis and Butthead?

Zac: Marilyn Manson, dont' be afraid, he's just our cousin. (Evil laugh)

Taylor: This book makes you think about what it means to be there for someone. If Sam ever were to die, we would all die a little with him. I mean, Lennie wasn't the one who was hurt when George had to shoot him. Lennie was not meant for a world of people who didn't care. George was ultimately protecting him. Not only that, Lennie actually thought he was finally going to get the farm he was dreaming of. George was the one who would miss the friendship. It's just that it proves that you really don't know who will still care until, well, it's gone.

Isaac: Exactly. It's also about being misunderstood. No one really understood what was going on with those guys (maybe Slim caught on a little). The best part is after Lennie was shot, when those two other guys were like (hick voice) "Now what the hell ya suppose is eatin' them two guys?" (sarcastic voice) Guys, the brain store just called, your models have been recalled for dangerously defective parts.

Zac: (smiling) Who else was thinking of "Billy Madison" and the penguin when that rabbit started talking to Lennie right before, you know, George had to shoot him? That was really weird.

Taylor: Half the songs in the world are written about being strange, if you really think about it (starts to sing Seal) "We're never going to survive, unless, we get a little crazy . . ."

Isaac: "No, we're never going to survive, unless, we are a little crazy . . ."

Taylor: You know how Mom is always having us visit our cousins. I know she can't read this book without trying to look like she's not crying.

Zac: Who was hiding the fact that they were crying. You or Mom?

Taylor: Okay, so it got to me too. alright, if enquiring minds must know, "Taylor Hanson cried."

Isaac: So you cried?

Taylor: Yes, I cried.

Zac: You cried?

Taylor: Ike, you weren't exactly chopping onions when I saw you finish the book either.

Isaac: Okay, Tay (dramatic sigh), so I got a little choked up. Zac, anything to add?

Zac: You promise not to say a word? You promise you will keep it quiet? (Isaac and Taylor look at each other then start towards him.) Hey guys. Was it something I . . . ugh (They pounce on him.)

(Mrs. Hanson catches the last of what was said. She comes in.)

Mrs. Hanson: Come on, take it easy on your brother. (Grinning) You know, you play by your own rules, and one day it will blow up in your face.

Isaac: Mom, I don't believe this.

Zac: (Joking) Mommy, save me! (Jumps into his mother's arms.)

Mrs. Hanson: It's okay, Zacky, sweetie. (He gets down.) Hey, I'm only saying that you never know what will happen when Zac and Mackie are finally able to take on their big brothers. I'm just going to say the endless energy factor may be a force to be reckoned with.

Isaac: I thought you were into non-violence, Mom.

Mrs. Hanson: I let the two of your practice karate on each other, didn't I? As long as we keep it in the family, I'm okay with it. (She grins). Seriously, you know how people are alwys asking you guys if you get jealous of each other or if our family has hard feelings about your music? This book illustrates how a really strong friendship, which is what I pray that you boys have, makes your music stand out, makes it meaningful. Some people aren't going to get that, but I think the best of the fans do. What do you think?

Taylor: Totally.

Mrs. Hanson: Okay, now I need reports from all of you about the Dust Bowl and the Great Depression which plays a major role in this book. You know that in one of Steinbeck's other books, The Grapes of Wrath, the main characters are from Oklahoma and are called "Okies."

Zac: Hey remember from Good Morning America (hick voice) Hi, I'm from Oklahoma.

Mrs. Hanson: Zac, honey, you now that judging people by their accent reveals just how ignorant you are. Just like, the length and blondness of a person's hair isn't a measure of their intelligence.

Isaac: Thank God. On the other hand, there might be one or two little exceptions to that rule (smirking in Zac's direction.).

Zac: Hey, (imiitates bully from New York) are you talking to me? Are you talking to me? Why don't we settle this thing right here (swinging his fists). Mano a mano.

Isaac: Sure, when you find him, tell him I'm ready, baby.

(Zac runs head first into Isaac. Mrs. Hanson starts to pull him back, when Taylor jumps into the pile.).

Mrs. Hanson: (Stepping back) We home school because . . . because . . .